SNL -- busted...
Out of context: Reply #95
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- kbags0
I can't get enough of this thread!
When you're 16 you have billions of dollars backing you, your show will go on. Unfortunately. So how did that weak ass apology go down you ask?
LORN: "Yeah, uh listen, Jude...would you mind kinda, you know, going out there and smoothing this one over with Ashlee for your big close?"
JUDE: "Will you put me in a film?"
LORN: "Sure. Listen, just blame it on the band. Ashlee, you got that?"
ASHLEE: (crying) "I'm not going back out there, no way."
JUDE: "Do the dance, no, beter yet, make fun of your funny dance."
PUBLICIST (via speakerphone): "Uh, no. Not the dance. Listen, just blame it on the band, they're all fired anyway. And the sound engineer, Lorn, he's gone, right?"
LORN: "He's living in a dumpster by Tuesday."
JUDE: "Isn't it a computer?"
LORN: "Jude, ahem, the film?"
JUDE: "Right. The band fucked up. Ashlee, you okay with that?"
ASHLEE: "Daddy, if I go back out there, can I have a Jaguar?"
DAD: "Sure, anything for my favorite youngest daughter."
ASHLEE: "And I'm talking XJ12, not another crappy little X-Type."
DAD (sweating): "But Ash, the royalty checks just started coming in...don't you want to save some money for your future?"
ASHLEE: Don't worry about the money, I'll make more.
PUBLICIST: Yeah, we'll make more. Lorn, can you put Ashlee in that film with Jude? It would go a long way, and I'll do my best to convince Tom (Cruise) to do SNL again. He always draws big ratings. Plus, the girl is clearly the next big silver screen superstar."
LORN: "Jude?"
JUDE: "Totally."
LORN: "DEAL. Ashlee?"
ASHLEE: "Okay, thanks."
HORATIO SANZ: And I'll roll a gigantor blunt so we can all forget about this little incident right after you get off stage! We're all rich, and we're still better than Mad TV!"
ALL: (Laughter)
(INSERT LAME-O SNL SKIT ENDING HERE. CUE LAUGHTER...)