Paris Hilton
Out of context: Reply #26
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the Paris Hilton thing -- she can't act, she can't sing, she's not funny, she's not smart, she's not interesting, she's not even that attractive ... and yet she's an A-list celebrity right now. Some things just can't be explained.
Time for a quick Paris story ...
On the day of the Super Bowl last February, I ended up in a six-car, police-escorted caravan that included both Hilton sisters. Don't ask. Anyway, when we arrived at the stadium, they shepherded our swollen group to a separate entrance, so the sisters wouldn't be bothered by common people and all. But there was some sort of holdup, so we ended up standing around for a few minutes, while my friend Paul cracked jokes like "Paris's butt is flatter than a manhole cover" and "When we get through security, Paris is probably going to frisk them."
Of course, Nicky and Paris stepped to the side for a cigarette break; and since they were only about 10 feet away, we watched them sucking down cigs and smiling at one another, like they were having a telepathic conversation that only included phrases like "This sucks" and "You have my lighter, right?" They looked like two quivering extra-terrestials -- barely clothed, fake tans, maybe 180 pounds combined, absolutely nothing to say to one another. It was riveting. I mean, the Patriots ended up WINNING THE SUPER BOWL, and watching the Hilton sisters share a butt was my most vivid memory of the day. That's how weird it was.
I don't know why I'm telling you this.