blog

Out of context: Reply #68952

  • Started
  • Last post
  • 75,527 Responses
  • notype0

    How do you manage a co-worker who will
    not give others a word in edgewise?

    I work with someone who's young (likely 27-29), he is whip-smart, but never gives others the floor to talk. Can be a detriment to our efforts. I often step in to give others the floor and or interrupt him to keep the conversation on track (even when there's an agenda that's been set).

    The way he talks about our clients is pretty degrading -- pinning his disdain to me as well which I don't share. I've been avoiding meetings with him, but he's one of our product owners. I can see the behavior linked to some kind of childhood trauma which makes it difficult to have a conversation with him about.

    • Take him aside and describe to him bluntly about how he interacts with others (or not), so he realises it? Failing that, stand behind him and SURPRISE KANCHONairn
    • Use him as a secret weapon. Keep him isolated like a gimp and let him loose on difficult clients.soundofreason
    • Tell him I'd would be helpful if he listened more and spoke at the end...Hayoth
    • Or treat him like a human being and talk to him in private about the problem he poses to the team.soundofreason
    • His childhood traumas should be of no concern to you if he can keep his attitude in check.soundofreason
    • Cut off his thumbs and set fire to his chair.i_monk
    • is it a white guy?oey
    • try and be honest to him.mugwart
    • Tell him not to speak when someone else its talking, its a bad habit and annoys the shit out of everyoneSlashPeckham
    • Be blunt. It has nothing to do with him being right.cannonball1978
    • After everything he says you then say "I completely understand your perspective on this however, I'd welcome contribution from others. ____ what do you think?"shapesalad
    • And place emphasis on the word 'understand'. Keep going like that. Lead by example. And also speak purposefully a little bit slowly to him, to help slow him.shapesalad
    • Whatever you say, start it with "This is your first warning..."Maaku
    • I really hate cunts like that.pedromendez
    • Start emphasizing manners at meetings by setting the tone yourself. Make him adjust else you need to gently but firmly correct him in front of the team.robotron3k
    • And don't waste any time in taking him aside for a "talk", it's not worth any amount of talent to do that, it's called work for a reason.robotron3k
    • If he's dragging you into his negative remarks as an unintended accomplice, make sure to tell him you don't share his opinions and if he insists, have the...ben_
    • confidence to spout it from his own soapbox. We've got one person like that where I'm at, I just avoid projects with them, but fortunately I can choose.ben_
    • "Dude, can you shut the fuck up for a minute?" when he does it. If he get's lippy, settle it outside. Winner gets to hook up with Jenny from accounting.section_014
    • Fire him for fuck‘s sake.SimonFFM
    • Everyone can have their place.Nairn
    • We are friendly with each other and I actually do think he's a genuine. I'll have him join me for lunch some day and be school him on the value of listening.notype
    • Wish he knew how to ask the right questions instead of gabbing so much.notype

View thread