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Had a chat with one of the headhunters I've been in touch with over the years, and he told me that it's generally the case that it can take creative directors a year+ to find a new job.
On the one hand, I suppose it's comforting to know I'm not alone — despite the fact being long-term unemployed robs you of everything you hold dear: your sense of security, your independence, your dignity, and even your sense of self and self-worth.
On the other hand, when I think that my three last full-time jobs only lasted six months each before I got the sack (ostensibly for 'financial reasons') and had long multi-month gaps between them, I can't help but think my career is finished, despite this headhunter's assurances.
And it's all my fault, in the end. Despite the stated reasons — if I'm absolutely honest — all three of those are agencies where I had trouble fitting in socially, and that's probably a more important retention criteria than the quality of your work.
It's even so problematic, that temp agencies offering minimum wage jobs have turned me down for it.
So on Monday — now that unemployment benefits have run out since the middle of February — I will do what I never thought in my life I would have to do: apply for welfare, what's known in Germany as Arbeitslosengeld II (or, colloquially, Hartz IV). Like everywhere else, there's definitely a stigma attached to it. If I don't do it, though, it means not being able to eat and not having a roof over my head (and I'm already three months behind on my rent).
And yet, somehow, I get up every morning — very often at 6.15 or 6.30, because the stress and fear and depression prevent me from getting a good night's quality sleep — and send my CV off (in many cases for the fourth or fifth or sixth time) to agencies, in the vague hope someone will give me another chance.
And, because my residence permit doesn't allow it, I can't freelance to keep food on the table and new work in my portfolio, so I'm locked into finding a full-time job.
Happy fucking Saturday, people.
- Re-reading this makes me want to vomit in sheer terror.Continuity
Wish I could helpmonospaced
- Cheers, mate. I suppose all I needed right now was to type it out, see it in black and white.Continuity
- Maybe expand your search beyond agencies. Try design shops and in-house positions too. More stable long run too.monospaced
- Write. Write feverishly about where you want to be. Do it for a couple hours. Look at it every day. Write some more or write it again tomorrow.notype
- "fitting in socially" is everything, so now you have free time then improve your body and your mind, this should be your main goal.robotron3k
- Also, if you're not getting CD gigs, which are difficult to get, then tone down your resume and pick up AD gigs...robotron3k
- Woah... Sorry for you mate, let me know if I can help someday, you've got my mail.
I'm serious. Stay strong!!OBBTKN
- Same in the states, it's become an ideological club of nepotism where agencies cheap and bloat with account service bs.Hayoth
- What type work do you do?Hayoth
- Thanks for the kind words and support, chaps. You're all lovely. <3
@OBBTKN: Will do!
@Hayoth: Integrated advertising, so everything from TVCs to digital.Continuity
- At least you're alive to fight another day. Try something new.docpoz
- What's your exact specialities? Can you design, well? Why not apply at smaller shops, design/ AD positions?M01XXX
- Good luck buddy. Something will turn up. Even if you have to change direction for a bit.Hayzilla
- what's your email?dyspl
- Sounds simple, don't be a Creative Director.shapesalad
- My comment isn't meant to sound mean. Just seems like your constraining yourself to a cd role that sounds so problematic.shapesalad
- "And, because my residence permit doesn't allow it, I can't freelance..." - Can't you work from cafe's or coworking spaces?zuch_markerburger
- 3 months behind rent? Ok you need to stop the current situation and make changes. Priority #1 is to earn and clear debts. Any job. Don't let debts grow.shapesalad
- Temp jobs not working? Ok go to all the restaurants in town and see if they need a dish washer. Anything, get going. Forget pride. Debt is your #1 enemy.shapesalad
- Priority is Debt. Can you be 4 months behind rent? 6 months? 12months behind rent?shapesalad
- You got to turn over every stone and be ready to work any job possible to clear that debt.shapesalad
- My father got behind on his rent, got into debt, kept his pride, wouldn't lower himself to a job of less status... got evicted. He was in a daze.shapesalad
- ^ I was unaware of it all, working in a different city. But had previously lent him money. But he kept spending on stupid stuff, wouldn't make cuts...shapesalad
- .. wouldn't take a simple job as he had his pride. Eventually the debt ruined him.shapesalad
- Good luck, Hope you clear the debt and get on track to where you want to be in life.shapesalad
- W hats your email? I can't help you but this message resonates so much with me. I know exactly what you're going through.Kiko
- The best I can think of is to send you an email with story in the hope it will help you through this.Kiko
- Company a friend is Design director at is hiring in Berlin, I can't promise anything but I can forward him your contact and resume.dyspl
- Hey man, in that boat for a year and finally getting out of it, in part thanks to a personal project (content I was sitting on and made something out of).spl33nidoru
- Like others have said, take care of yourself, be more social, and if you have no work right now keep busy with whatever you can do on your own, it feels goodspl33nidoru
- and gives you something to reconnect with satisfaction and pridespl33nidoru
- @shapesalad, you're right about the debt thing. I think this is the real killer for me, and I totally agree about finding any old job to pay the bills.Continuity
- @Kiko and dyspl:
Email is http://tny.im/dag, you have to do a Captcha-type thingy, though, to see it.Continuity