Bill Murray
Out of context: Reply #23
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He has also been spotted by gossip reporters and police investigators showing up uninvited at “hipster” parties in places like Williamsburg, Brooklyn, once a Jewish enclave now a secret community of bearded 20-somethings wasting their parent’s hard-earned money on cocaine and clothes. Yes, he likes to slip into crowds half his age, squeeze the smooth young legs of Sarah Lawrence grads while joking with indie-band drummers about German poets, groping young men in Union Square Park, asking for change and warning them to tell no one, or singing to Japanese schoolgirls as they shower. One notorious urban legend recounts how Murray encouraged a subway train of young people to strip off their pants at midnight while he sang to them. (Evidence: “Sad Bill Murray: Accosting People In Union Square” and “Bill Murray Reads Poetry to Construction Workers”.)
THE BILL MURRAY EXPERIENCE
Mr. Murray likes to play the gentle, befuddled older man, one who could ask a child to help him find a puppy in a quiet corner of a public park. Yet once you agree, it’s too late. You’ve been drawn into his celebrity orbit, like some delicious secret Bill has deigned to share with the modest creature that is you. Yes, this is the Bill Murray experience, showering the simple with his celebrity charm in the dark alleyways of America. But what is the endpoint here? The pattern is familiar to criminologists and it’s not hard to draw similarities to the lives of Jeffrey Dahlmer or John Wayne Gacy. Murray has not yet been charged with anything more than narcotic arrests and drunk driving, but at the very least parents should be deeply concerned. Is it not better to be safe than sorry when dealing with a man who may be the next national scandal for his bloodthirst and perversion? Would you not do everything in your power to protect your children from death and failure?
In an era when honest, clean hard work makes the most righteous of our youth generation rise to the top, this man Murray represents the scum of the bottom. We need heroes to inspire our children to excel in math and sports, to stand muscle to muscle with those hearty Russians, brain to brain with the human calculators of China. We need American heroes who hark back to the greatest era of Christian morality and innovation, the men who protected the planet from the scourge of Soviet communism while simultaneously inventing the personal computer and the internet.
Instead, we have boozy Bill Murray on our screens, luring young teens to jump in to his musty van of laziness. He seems to say it’s okay to be white and old and a fool because this country is good and will reward you your failure (welfare?). No, this is wrong. We need adults who act like adults: grandfathers who impart patriotism on their offspring, dedicated employees who keep the engines of our economy greased irregardless of their aging, noble gentlemen who are humble before their great God. We do not need perverts like Bill Murray lusting after our beautiful children with a reckless almost urgent need to tear them from innocence so he can insanely explore his lost, burning childhood on their soft bodies on old couches in dirty apartments in the ghettos of America. What have we lost? What will we ever gain? What does it mean when we say that Jesus died for our sins? What has happened to the country I once loved!