Clean, Christian jokes

Out of context: Reply #4

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  • mg331

    One Sunday morning, little Bobby is playing with a toy firetruck on the grass and sidewalk not far from the front of a church. As he pushes it along, it suddenly gets stuck in the mud.

    "Motherfucker!" screams Bobby. "You better get your ass out of the mud you piece of crap! I'm gonna destroy you piece of shit!"

    Inside the church, the Pastor is in the middle of his sermon when he hears the dreadful profanity through the open side door. He ends the sermon and as the organ playing starts, the Pastor goes outside to see what's wrong and put a stop to the awfulness.

    "Little boy, little boy," he says. "That's some awful language from a boy your age!"

    "Well my fuckin' fire truck got it's wheels stuck in the mud and I can't get the damn thing out!," the boy says.

    "Little boy, God doesn't look too well on language like that," the Pastor says. "Don't you know that God is all around you and hears everything you say?"

    "He is?," says the boy.

    "Oh yes, God is everywhere," says the Pastor.

    "Is he over there by that tree?"

    "Of course," says the Pastor.

    "Is he in my room when I sleep at night?"

    "Always," says the Pastor. "He's always around you."

    "Is God over there by that playground?"

    "Yes," says the pastor.

    "Is God inside my firetruck?" asks the boy?

    "Well sure, he's everywhere," says the Pastor.

    "Well then tell him to get the fuck out and start pushing!"

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