Breakup Advice
Out of context: Reply #137
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- Codfather_0
Codfather, believe me when I say that 27 is probably one of the most difficult in-between ages that people get to - ahead of you you just see the staid married life that you had drawn so much of your teen and early twenties identity from, you start to question those attitudes of mature rebellion and 'freedom' that you have spent the last 10 years honing, and cant see any happy way to transition, hell - you don't want to become what it is you perceive being properly grown up (30), to be..
But honestly mate, for me certainly, 30 was a great milestone, to get to 30 with 10 years of a meaningful relationship behind you would just be fantastic I think - you're really not going to change much in the next 5 years, if you're happy now, be glad and look forward to tomorrow, next year/5 years ahead will take care of itself, if you love this girl, and you feel loved then run with it, the single life is one that people remember through rose colored specs, forgetting that it was more often than not drinking and socialising to try and meet someone to counter the lonliness of sleeping and being alone, however fun that process was..
Just dont confuse your relationship for your own individual existential angst, talk and grow together, and then decide.
mikotondria2
(Aug 16 07, 16:51)can't log in with my prev login as im on my laptop and can't remember my passw - anyhow....
mikotondria2 - after much worry, thinking and frustration over the last few days I've made the decision not to break up with her. I had a quick look at this thread just to thank the people that gave their advice (aside from the ones that told me to become a monk or gay, although that was tempting).
I hit upon your response randomly and it is 100% what I was thinking yesterday and is bang on what I feel - mighty strange!
I realised that I love her too much to through it all away and that the desire that men have to screw around is always going to be there whatever relationship their in - at least on the evidence of the majority of friends that I have and what I have been feeling.
The point that someone made about living for now and if you're happy now (as you say) you should be glad and that living in the past or anticipating the future is not the way to go. I almost feel that because we got together so young I have anticipated that we were always going to break up one day and in a way that had sedated me in our relationship and I wasn't giving 100% recently.
Anyway I have gone with my gut feeling and I feel really happy about that now.
Ta for everyones comments again! Hell of a lot cheaper than a therapist.