Bi-Polar bear
Out of context: Reply #18
- Started
- Last post
- 105 Responses
- foreign0
Here's my experience with this:
I was treated for anxiety and other drug related issues - I had a panic attack mid-flight on a Friday, and booked myself in for treatment the Monday morning - the medication I was on was commonly used by schizo patients, and I was also on anti-depressants. The medication was very strong, I had this thick, chemical feeling in my head all the time. The reason I decided to stop using them was this:
'if I'm not on medication, and I don't need them, then there's nothing wrong with me'.
Who wants to be diagnosed as schizophrenic. I was 21 at the time (25 now). I had also stopped all other drug use, and wanted to stop the prescribed meds as well. Anyway...
I stopped using the anti-depressants first: the withdrawal from these were pretty bad: I felt physically ill for a few weeks, with constant headaches - apparently this is common - but I didn't feel any big mood changes.
A few weeks later I stopped the other medication. (This was really very strong supressants.) The biggest immediate problem with stopping them was insomnia - I got very little sleep for months and months, but my mind/thoughts were clearer. I had a few more panic attacks, but they became less intense every time. Haven't had one for 3 years.
I've been of the meds (and drugs and alcohol) for 4 years now. I still have problems with insomnia, but the last couple of years it's been less frequent; maybe 2/3 nights every couple of weeks. There's been stages where I've been depressed, but nothing I couldn't deal with. Over the last few years, and especially just after stopping the medication I've learned alot about myself, and I've learned to cope with, and identify what's going on mentally and emotionally. I've learned how to 'create' a good working environment (both productively and creatively), how to avoid social situations I'm uncomfortable with, etc.
When I was on the medication I lost relationships, I was unable to resolve bigger issues in my life, I lost alot of drive and energy. At the moment I have problems with creativity (which I think is a direct result of the schizo meds). I also have problems with concentration. I have problems with commitment, I tend to isolate. But maybe alot of these things are just part of my personality. There's no doubt that the medication, and of course the situations leading to me getting treatment changed me.
Anyway, I believe I'm better off for it.