Kona Stories 2727 Responses

Last post: 2 months, 1 week ago | Thread started: Sep 26, 08, 9:05 a.m.

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• spendogg

  Dammit Kona. I need to hear that smoothie story again. I am in great need of a larf.

  Sep 26, 08, 9:05 a.m. – Permalink

• ninjasavant

  ha ha, yeah!

  

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  Dog-earSep 26, 08, 9:06 a.m. – Permalink

• CALLES

  fine... play hard to get you cocky son of a bitch

  

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  Dog-earSep 26, 08, 9:17 a.m. – Permalink

• Jaline

  Now that I think of it, k0na has some great stories.

  My favourites include:
  - that one hot girl at his reunion who remembered how nice he was to her in school.
  - that time when kona took the fault for cheating on an ex, when it wasn't really him. (more to the story, obviously)

  • he latter there is a classic. God loves a doug– kelpie1/2

    Thanks Jaline! Thanks Kelpie! You guys rock!– kona2/2

  

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  Dog-earSep 26, 08, 9:22 a.m. – Permalink

• chossy

  that time when kona beefed ten chicks in a oner then, they turned out to be bitch dudes.

  

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  Dog-earSep 26, 08, 9:23 a.m. – Permalink

• megE

  i'm new to the kona stories (just the beating up the hooker in vegas story) so i'm intrigued

  

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  Dog-earSep 26, 08, 9:24 a.m. – Permalink

• CALLES

  the time he snorted meth out for my ass crack

  

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  Dog-earSep 26, 08, 9:24 a.m. – Permalink

• flavorful

  The time kOna shot a kid in sixth grade for stepping on his Jordans. Then years later in retrospect realizing that they were just a pair of shoes and shouldn't have shot the kid in the face.

  But the kid was already dead, and enough time had passed so that he could talk about it openly because of statute of limitations.

  

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  Dog-earSep 26, 08, 9:26 a.m. – Permalink

• 23kon

  what about the story where he admitted having sex with all those minors

  • Yea that is fucking disgusting. Disgusting. Just ... yuck.
    * Walks away slowly. *– flavorful1/3

    Meanwhile, in Pittsburgh...– Jaline2/3

    hahaha– flavorful3/3

  

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  Dog-earSep 26, 08, 9:27 a.m. – Permalink

• 23kon

  oops, shit, spelling mistake

  should have been Miners!

  

  • teehee– 23kon

  

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  Dog-earSep 26, 08, 9:27 a.m. – Permalink

• CALLES

  the time that he was talking about his penis size and he said that he was big at 4" and killed the thread

  

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  Dog-earSep 26, 08, 9:30 a.m. – Permalink

• PonyBoy

  i enjoyed all the cheerful moments between he and dobs over the years... his stories rank a high second though

  :)

  • after flav?– Jaline1/5

    after CALLES? or miko?– Jaline2/5

    nothing touches a dobs and kona moment, missy– PonyBoy3/5

    OK, just curious :)– Jaline4/5

    Sha sha sha!– flavorful5/5

  

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  Dog-earSep 26, 08, 9:32 a.m. – Permalink

• mg33

  Kona - tell that story about being at the gym, and your ipod battery dying, and hearing something hilarious from a woman on a treadmill and busting out laughing.

  • no.– studderine

  

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  Dog-earSep 26, 08, 9:34 a.m. – Permalink

• CALLES

  Kona Chronicles

  

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  Dog-earSep 26, 08, 9:38 a.m. – Permalink

• _salisae_

  i had a winter design your cubicle contest and k0na0nak (or whatever it was) suggested i put play snow everywhere and come to work dressed up to go skiing.

  AND I WON.

  i made up that last part but i did think his was a clever idea.

  • YAY!– kona

  

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  Dog-earSep 26, 08, 9:42 a.m. – Permalink

• _salisae_

  this character somehow reminds me of him

  

  • My all-time favorite line from that show is when Willis' father is marrying one of Willis' ex-flings, he says...– blaw1/7

    "This is the man that taught me about shaving. That taught me abut women. That taught me about shaving women."– blaw2/7

    this is pretty accurate i must say... speaking latitudinal of course.– PonyBoy3/7

    ... and I...
    ... am now a marked man.
    :D– PonyBoy4/7

    hahaha yea, kOna is a midget that is the first thing I thought about too Pony, hahaha– flavorful5/7

    hahah!!– PonyBoy6/7

    HAHA! that is totally me. Nicely done.– kona7/7

  

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  Dog-earSep 26, 08, 9:55 a.m. – Permalink

• flavorful

  The time when kOna sang "Purple Rain" at a karaoke bar in Gary, Indiana and got called out for an encore, but instead of an encore song, he decided to see how many cartwheels he could do.

  The number turned out to be 24 which is impressive on its own, but the most impressive part is that he held everyone's attention for that long as after the 3rd cartwheel most people would get kind of bored. But he brought them back when he hit 15.

  • this could be true.– studderine1/2

    that COULD be true! hahah– kona2/2

  

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  Dog-earSep 26, 08, 10:17 a.m. – Permalink

• studderine

  k0na is a no go for the qbn today; try him on monday.
  sincerely,
  k0na's liaison

  

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  Dog-earSep 26, 08, 11:08 a.m. – Permalink

• studderine

  i have stories, but i dont believe you care.

  • i saw that pic of him grabbing your arse– CALLES1/2

    yea, it was hot.– studderine2/2

  

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  Dog-earSep 26, 08, 11:10 a.m. – Permalink

• flavorful

  The time when kOna shared a picture of this really hot broad in the background (I don't look at his wife or any of my friend's significants in that way - they're are immediately designated to sister material) and then shared the picture of her entire person later when requested.

  That was awesome. She was smoking.

  This whole post is coming off really weird now that I think about it, haha.

  • LOL! I aim to please dude!– kona

  

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  Dog-earSep 26, 08, 11:21 a.m. – Permalink

• kona

  LOL. Some super funny comments in here. Thanks guys!

  I'd post more but I gotta get ready for a rehearsal luncheon today for a wedding... our 6th of the season.

  -----

  My humor got the better half of me not too long ago. A few weeks ago I did some work for some online ads we were going to run for Notre Dame. Well, I pushed the ads without thinking twice about it and got a call at about 10pm to fix the descriptions. Seemed I forgot to re-write them.

  Ventana Sweater:
  Embroidered sweater that any man is sure to love. Except of course real men who wouldn't be caught dead in it.

  Notre Dame Rugby Shirt:
  Embroidered Rugby shirt. Wear it and be original like all the other guys on campus wearing the same shirt thinking they're original and cool while drinking Keystone Light from a tap for $.50 on a Tuesday at 11am with their torn hat worn sideways and Rugby shirt tucked into their oversized belt buckle.

  Had to come in WAY early and change the HTML before too many Notre Dame fans got a look at everything. Good thing my boss has a very good sense of humor.

  • I LITERALLY JUST TOLD THIS STORY THE OTHER WEEK HAHAHHAHA!!!!– flavorful1/2

    To my sister's fiancee after I told him the love affair all Irish-Americans have with Notre Dame, hahaa.– flavorful2/2

  

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  Dog-earSep 26, 08, 11:23 a.m. – Permalink