Idiocy
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- Raniator
Just heard someone on the phone giving out their email address...
"....co.uk. All in lower case."
What?! Since when has that EVER made a difference.
What is your dumb-as-fuck story of the day?
- Ranger0
At an old company I worked at the IT guy actually had to tell a senior editor that she was using the mouse upside down - hence it behaving erratically.
- kelpie0
yeah I started using a wireless mouse the wrong way round in a meeting recently, was wondering why the computer suddenly had airplane controls...
I was still a bit pissed from the night before, if that mitigates it in any way
- maximillion_0
a client who thought it was our fault his video based website was too slow even though he was piggy-backing his neighbours wifi
- Spookytim0
"... .co.uk. All in italics."
- ESKEMA0
one time here at work a client for who we were doing some invites informed us that the electronic version of the invite only had one side.. the front.
ok... we will take that in consideration
- ian0
A guy I work with answered the phone and when asked if a colleague was there said 'He can't come to the phone, he's in the toilet'.
I cracked up. He could have just said 'he's not at his desk' instead of 'I think he's taking a massive dump'. Not really stupid, but I found it funny.
- TheBlueOne0
I had gotten a call one time from a friend of mine who was trying to go to the url he saw on some billboarrd in new york. He sent me a pic of trhe billboard and the morons who designed it had it look like this:
"www pépé auto group .com"
and he didn't know how to put in the accented e's...
- TheBlueOne0
I mean:
"www pépé auto group .com"
- Spookytim0
"... .co.uk. All in Copperplate Script."
- Drno0
could you please stamp it in seemwhykey
- moth0
This one isn't technical, or recent. Once while on a train, I was reading a book using an old ticket as a bookmark. This huge souf-london type bounds down the carriage and I can see him spying my ticket. He snatches it out of my book and continues down the carriage - only to return about 20 seconds later to complain that it wasn't valid.
- chossy0
I was digitising from a harddrive based camera at my work and it was a new type different to the ones we use, so I decided o take in all the footage as the harddrive was full and it had footage that was ten minutes long 30 minutes long and about an hour long, I had plenty of time to do it and there was no rush.
One of the producers came in and said have you got the footage we need in yet?. I said not yet I am taking everything in so I can find out exactly how long things take and how big the files are once they are ingested, so that in future if you ask me how long things take or how big the files are I can give you plenty of information, if I don't do this then I cannot tell you how long things take and how big the files will be.
She replied with they take as long as they take and the files will be as big as they will be, so stop what your doing and just digitise the frootage I want.
I complied, about a week later the same camera came in it was full etc. etc. she asked me to take in all the footage, I began and she called me every ten minutes askin if it was done yet and how big would the files be as she needed them put on a drive and wanted to know how big a drive to buy, I said it will take as long as it takes and the files will be as big as they will be. Sorry I can't answer your question.People have no patience these days, and just dive right in without thinking about the bigger picture.
- Jnr_Madison0
This is a bit off message but my postman just put a used tissue through my door, dirty fucker.
I shouldn't have wanked him off in the hall I suppose.
- ian0
Not technical at all (like moths above) but while sitting on the top deck of a bus one day, I was reading a book and listening to music and happened to stumble into a strange conversation with a skanger (dublin version of a chav) on the seat next to me.
skanger: What are you reading?
me: A book
skanger: why? are you in school.
me (looking around to check): no, just reading. for fun.
skanger: jaysus, don't know why. Anyway, can't read on a bus, not a book anyway. Not listening to music. How can you do both at the same time?
me: eh?
skanger: makes me sick even thinking about it.
me: yeah...put my headphones back in but I could still hear him gibbering away. Reminded me of the bill hicks gag, 'what you reading for...'
- Spookytim0
At one job I sat opposite this other bloke and we both used to listen to our own music on headphones. I would occasionally tap out a drum solo on my desk with my fingers, and I would frequently notice that he found this very amusing indeed. He would watch me do it, then chuckle to himself whilst shaking his head.
One day I got really curious about what was so funny after he'd smirked at my brief spell of finger drumming. I took my headphones off and he did the same, and I asked him.
He said he didn't mean any offense but as I was asking he would tell me... he thought it was really funny how appalling my sense of rhythm was. I then had to explain to him, more than once, that I was drumming to the music on MY headphones, not his.
- maximillion_0
ive lost count of the number of times ive been contacted by clients complaining about not having email. i usually start by seeing if they have an intertnet connection by getting them to go to a website. 9/10 they dont, some of them even think they dont need an internet connection for email too <- these are the ones who usually try to dictate what web standards are...like fluid layout sites, drop downs at the bottom of the screen etc.
ameeezin
- Corvo0
I thought PIITB was "punches "it" in the balls", but today I learned it's much less masculine than that. So i pitied it in the brain.
- Spookytim0
Same Bloke...
We were proposing a brand concept called "Gallery of Life" ... hoary old shoite I know, but it was back in the 90's. It was important that the client understood the gallery of life photographic style wasn't about slick beautiful models shot by professional photographers it was about depicting real people in real situations, warts and all, and the only criteria was that the people in the shots were positive, happy looking people.
We had a giant gallery wall in the presentation room and had covered it in positive looking people from all walks of life to convey the idea to the client.
The presentation was going really well. We were all chipping in and talking about different shots on the wall, why we liked them and how they had relevance to the client (a bank), so Mr Headphones from the story above is really getting into it and points out a picture of a downs syndrome boy sat on a beach laughing. He explains, very eloquently, why he likes the shot... summer, bright, colourful, uplifting, charming smiling face of the boy, and then he seeks to contextualise the image for the client
".. and yeah, this could be a really useful sort of image for... you know... brochures and leaflets aimed at getting mongols and other disabled people to open bank accounts. Becuase they do have bank accounts, so, you know, its important to make them feel special"
Obviosuly not word for word, but that was the essence of what he said and he used the word "mongol" without batting an eyelid.
- maximillion_0
i take it the guy with downs wasnt from mongolia then :D
- kelpie0
did you confront him about it later?