Broken Collar Bone
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- CALLES0
weekend stripping gig
- CALLES0
i told a mac freak that apple sucks ass
- ian0
'your mother'
- harlequino0
Extreme Bukkake.
- CALLES0
kona forgot that he was supposed to spot you while you where doing 500lbs bench press or squats
- chossy0
say you were drawing a wolf hair by hair and things got too real and it leapt from the page and thrust itself towards you at which point you ran it through with your fountain pen, unfortunatly the beast had managed to strike you firmly on the collar bone you suspect it may be fractured yet need a professional diagnosis.
- GreedoLives0
backyard brawl UFC tryout and you drew kimbo slice
- ian0
You could just pick a random title from the PV and be mysterious.
Hey what happened to your collar bone?
The face of JesusHey what happened to your collar bone?
Printers in the uketc etc. Enjoy it.
- harlequino0
(Hillary Clinton/Obama Barack) broke my collar bone.
- tymeframe0
"was caught by the wife/girlfriend looking at pictures of Lindsay Lohan."
- ian0
"was caught by Lindsay Lohanlooking at pictures of the wife/girlfriend."
- lvl_130
sing it to them:
http://www.ltd-design.com/itown-…
- spendogg0
My dog got scared and i slipped on Peanut Butter.
- chossy0
Say you were brain storming and your thought thunder got out and lets face it a broken collar bone is getting let off lightly when your mind power is unleashed.
- CALLES0
tell him that you were in the dessert and feel off your motorcycle... that is totally make you look coolisimo
- "feeling off" one's motorcycle is less than cool, sorry. ;)harlequino
- hahahah... funny thing is how i said "him"CALLES
- feeling off in the dessert!?!?! totally ghey.paraselene
- doesnotexist0
it's fun to come up with stories to tell people and yet you can't come up with stories?!
c'mon, dude!
- c'mon dude. i came up with 10 and they've been worn out.cbass99
- ian0
Hey what happened to your collar bone?
Have you ever seen the film 'Gymkata'? Well its a lot like that...
- flavorful0
After years of surfing the internet I finally came to the end. A pop-up came up on my screen saying, "Congratulations, you have successfully completed the internet!"
When I hit the OK button ... I guess I wasn't really sure what was going to happen but a jolt ran right into my computer, right into my mouse kicking my arm back, I fucking Bruce Lee'd my own collar bone and the worst part is I was at the *end* of the internet but I wasn't at the *end* of my internet ...
Well ... of course as luck would have it, my roommate came back saying he forgot a book or something and does a classic double take. I think, he came in running mumbling, "FORGOT MY Buuhhhh ... whatthefuckingfuck." I didn't hear footsteps after that, but heard him slowly get out his phone and dial 911.
It was a clean fracture in that it was completely clean through my skin, the collar bone that is. Blood was everywhere as I remained helpless on the floor, laughing to myself the only way true pain can make you laugh. At the time I reached the climax internet, I have to admit, I had yet to get both legs out of my boxers - but I don't know if it was the sheer rush of pain, or sense of accomplishment in conquering the internet ... but I had climaxed myself while momentarily in euphoria between when my sound barrier crash landing happened, and waking up to the taste of my own blood.
Well ... I thought it tasted a little weird for blood. It's not like I'm a vampire. I don't crave blood, or suck the blood out of cuts I receive. That's disgusting, and vile. I remember tasting my own blood as a child as I believe most do out of curiosity. I always thought if I ate Iron Man's suit piece by piece it would taste like my blood.
I did not remember it having such texture, however, or my yearning for crackers after I picked my first scab when I was 6. Or the smell of a smoldering, aflamed laptop either - slowly engulfing the rest of the apartment in its wrath.
I appreciate my flat friend's quick reaction time, and concise speech though when explaining the situation. Any more dire seconds lost and I may have bled to death and been none the wiser. The last words I made out were, "YOU HAVE GOT TO GET OVER HERE A PICTURE IS NOT GOING TO DO THIS FUCKING JUSTICE AT ALL. PLEASE BRING A VIDEO ...."
Safely I assume the picture was to convey the 1,000 words which he did not have the time for, and the video ... I am going to say camera was for insurance purposes so they could see the roaring fire and aftermath as insurance companies like a little pizazz outside of the old, "One irreplaceable Nintendo Power Glove that I would wear to breakfast on Saturdays." If they could actually see it's scarred sacred remains and my reaction to it, they would know the 1.5 million I was asking was not in vain.
Long story short, 4-6 weeks and I'm back in business baby!
- CALLES0
I GOT IT!!!!!
go to :50secs
- "ohhh, oh dear. I think she is actually hurt, there"harlequino
- hahahahahahahahahaha...
too fuckin funny!ian - Ok, Ive watched this about 5 times and it just keeps getting funnier!ian
- its so funny that she tries to cheat or something at the end =)CALLES