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I know there's a lot of Dad's on here and was hoping you could point me to some resources? I'm expecting my first this May and I have a lot of downtime the next few months. So I would love to see what you all are reading.
Through combing the QBN posts I found newbly.com (which required an invite?) And newdadmanual.ca
Any others you guys could recommend would be much appreciated.
Thanks for helping a new Dad out!
You're not going to have time to read blogs!
First of all congrats! We had our first in July and it's a hell of a lot of work.. but equally as much joy. I found one blog that I read when I'm bored, http://www.howtobeadad.com/.
Other than that I hated the What to Expect site (http://www.whattoexpect.com). I used to read it for the weekly updates on what was happening with the baby and who ever writes that stuff is mildly insensitive and moronic. Instead I preferred http://www.babycenter.com/
Best things I did to prepare for being a dad.
1) Infant specific first aid course. So I don't completely lose my shit in an emergency.
2) Got the ex - ambo running said first aid course to make me a first aid kit that travels with the kids (normal ones are full of useless bollocks, you want big burn shields, instant cold packs and pre-stitched wound bandages.
3) Dont watch the prenatal vid, usually made in the 80s and will stress you out, every birth is different and you will have someone who has delivered hundreds of babies walking you through it.
Everything else pretty much looks after itself, and its awesome dude congrats!
- first aid course, yup. did it and had to use it when my 1.5 yr old started choking on a fish cracker.prophetone
- Fist aid class- I hadn't thought of yet. Good call! And Thanks!raybolger2
- we took it with a group of friends and it was given by ambulance paramedics, worth every pennyprophetone
- and it was fun with friends...prophetone
- Yeah they are totally worth the time and the money.slappy
not a blog to read, but -
we took a lamaze class when we were expecting our first... absolutely awful and pointless information, but, we're still good friends with some of the other attendees now (6 yrs on) and better than any written advise was all of us going thru the same things at roughly the same time... supporting/helping each other thru the unknown.
anyway, good luck, and congrats!
true story. no matter what you read, no matter how prepared you think you are, you will have the baby, drive it home for the first time (doing 20km/hr), open your front door, sit down on the couch beside your wife with the kid on the coffee table in their little car seat and you will just stare for 5 mins in silence and realize in that moment you have no f*cking idea what you're doing. but, that's when the adventure begins...
I hit the gym every other day for over 3 months when my son was on the way.... glad I did too cause when he did arrive, the first three months of his life were severe sleep deprivation, 40 hr work weeks, and brutal mood swings from the wife.
Get your fitness up kid... shits about to get real.
Go to the pub, stay there till May.
Congrats mate, my first comes in April. I like the first aid suggestion. I'm getting on that shit!
I did it old school with both my kids. I was out in the hall, wife gave birth, "Would you like to come in and cut the cord?" "Why yes I would..." I don't understand this whole share the birth experience with the wife" thing. My wife didn't want me in there either, so it was good all around.
First kid? Utterly terrifying. Lots of What the fuck am i doing? Oh shit is the kid alright! moments. Also, for the father, I found the first few months difficult as small infants aren't the most engaging thing in the world and quite demanding. While the moms are busy doing the whole breast feeding bonding thing we get the "Here, carry this screaming thing around until it stops" moments. I didn't get into the happy groove of fatherhood until my first was maybe around 6, 7 months old. But that's just me.
2nd kid is much easier. All "Oh, she's crying, that's ok." and "Oh, she's chewing on the wire? That's ok as long as she doesn't swallow anything..." (i kid) but the second time around you wonder what all the fuss was about the first time.
Anyway, anything you read on the internet is going to either induce panic or lull you into a false sense of security - so just avoid it really. Avoid parenting mags even more.
You'll need less fancy baby gizmos than you think. You'll need more toys than you think.
All of your problems in the first two years will primarily revolve around eating and sleeping. Sleeping probably moreso.
Remember, open and put the clean diaper underneath the child before changing the old dirty one. That would be my number one tip.
Read to them early. Count things out loud from pretty early on.
It won't come up for at least two years, but avoid the fucking play doh. that shit is evil. Anyone who gives it to you as a gift, cross them off your holiday card list.
There's a lot of making it up as you go along. Do whatever works to keep you, the mom and the kid happy.
And congrats on the onrushing arrival of the new wee one.
- Also get as many tips form nurses at hospital as you can. Also grab as many freebies from hospital as well...TheBlueOne
- +1 on the play doh insightBluejam
- Thanks TheBlueOne! Some sound advice. I'm going to try and not totally inundate myself with parent magazines and such. Just the basics. I'm thinking I need a crib/car seat/and......?? < no idearaybolger2
Different strokes for different folks and all, but watching my son be born and take his first breath was probably the most important moment of my life. I still cry when I look back at the pictures and relive it.
Hey- just wanted to thank you all for your contributions. Some sound advice, good stories, and some great resources make this Dad-to-be feel much better.
Congrats man, I became a dad back in November and it's a huge change, but so great.
Seeing this thread makes me think there should be some parenting thread on here.
There's a book that pretty much sums up a lot of useful information. It was really helpful for me and my wife the first year. It's called "What to Expect When you're Expecting" and "What to Expect the 1st Year"
They're really great resources. They answer a lot of questions you will have. I highly recommend.
In addition to what prophetone said up there - you'll discover, as soon as you get home, at least 5 things you forgot to buy / do prior to the baby's arrival. Hopefully all minor. We discovered we had no newborn clothes.
Also, see if you can start adjusting your cooking now - if you make soup or pasta sauce, make a double batch and freeze it. Find recipes for things that can go all day in a slow-cooker, or be put together the night before with minimal effort and baked straight from the fridge the next day (i.e. lasagna). If you can minimize the effort but still have a good home-made meal, you will feel way, way better.