why do company meetings suck?
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- zenmasterfoo
The whole staff is eating lunch together and acting like they enjoy doing this. Our "monthly" meeting, which is more like our "if it happens this quarter we're lucky" meeting is set to take place in a few minutes and I've left the conference room out of boredom.
This does not bode well for the mandatory Q&A session that we've been told about. If no one actually has a question to ask, they will randomly choose people to ask something pertinent.
Ideas? Get creative, I feeling like insulting someone.
- Jnr_Madison0
"You a company man?"
- bulletfactory0
Meetings should always have a PAL (purpose, agenda, and limit). Never meet to define a problem.
- I wish they'd put a limit on the crap the sales director says...it's all shitezenmasterfoo
- brandelec0
"Does this meeting have a PAL?"
- Jnr_Madison0
"You looking at me?"
- zenmasterfoo0
Crap, off I go. I hope I don't mouth off in there. Be back in 2 hours or so.
- harlequino0
Ours are similar to this.
- braaad0
Ugh I feel you. Fucking worthless for the most part, huge waste of time. Then it reminds me that half the people in our company attend meetings all day, while the other half actually makes stuff. But the half that sits on their asses all day and talk mad shit get paid more. How does that work??
- One of life's little ironies.zenmasterfoo
- You need to pay good money for the quality talent...skwiotsmith
- waterhouse0
There's always one person asserting themselves repeatedly with unnecessary questions - no doubt prolonging an already painfully boring meeting by an extra 15-odd minutes.
- and today that title goes to our Director of Sales...blah blah blah...blah.....stup... joke...blah...zenmasterfoo
- MondoMorphic0
At my former company, I would literally spend the entirety of every single day in meetings. Brainstorming meetings. All-hands meetings. Skip-level meetings with execs. Planning meetings (i.e., meetings to plan for future meetings). Staff meetings. Community meetings. Committee meetings. "Special" meetings to discuss mission statements. Department meetings. Division meetings. Mid-year review meetings. Annual review meetings. Meetings to plan for next year's review meetings. 180 review meetings.
From 8AM to 6PM, I would sit listlessly in boring, soul-draining meetings, and then, once I got home that night, start actually working (in preparation for the next day's meetings).
What's funny is that I left that company to go freelance and now they are one of my clients. The thing is that now, I get paid more, I don't spend all day sitting in braindead meetings, and best of all, I do WAY more actual design for them now than when I worked there!
- somatica0
We have bi-weekly status meetings that are nothing more than "we're going to blow some corporate mumbo jumbo talk up your asses and tell you our pipeline is full while we try and figure out why we had 65 new clients last year and ZERO returning clients, so continue surfing the web for 'inspiration' until we figure out why we have 10 vps and 10 evps for 150 people."
Never once have we had a constructive meeting and for almost 2 years now everything they've said they were going to do in these meetings (post-mortem on all projects, new office chairs, let us tear down the outer walls of our cubes, new lighting, new creative room, clean out the storage room and turn it into a media room), none have come true.
It just dawned on me how much I hate this job. SHIT.
- dude. consider this our group therapy session. ding! your time is up..zenmasterfoo
- So how much do I owe you?somatica
- MondoMorphic0
Oh crud - I forgot to mention all the Scrum-related meetings we had as well (Scrum, for those of you who don't know, is a ridiculous, development process). Day-long meetings to plan for what was going to happen during subsequent Scrum "sprints."
- For serious? You use scrum?What size is your organisation?pylon
- morilla0
hahah, they did this as a joke at our last one to see if people would fall for it. Sure enough , half way through the meeting some dipshit stood up and yelled Bingo!!! He had no idea he had been had.
- ninjasavant0
so far as I know IBM has a patent on meetings and we get our money's worth.