Dear Cat
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- i_R_error
Dear cat next door
If I catch you shitting in my garden one more time, Im going to bury you in it.
Thats a promise.
- RoyBoyII0
Could be worse.
At least its not shitting on your door step.
- Jnr_Madison0
You're lucky, I have to pay people to shit in my garden.
- i don't have a garden :(Jnr_Madison
- garden = chestneue75_bold
- I work in code these days.Jnr_Madison
- i_R_error0
Fuckin neighbours. they dont have a garden. we do, so their fuckin cat leaves stinky fishy shits everywhere. it doesnt bury them like most cats do. it also spends the hours from 2am-6am fighting and whining with another cat from some other zealot. before i bury him, i might shit on it myself, then watch it lick itself clean. then bury it alive.
- sublocked0
man i feel your pain.
all the neighborhood cats duel in my backyard at odd hours, setting off the motion lights. if i could catch them i'd kill them. i'm thinking of taking up firing practice with my .357, but that might wake the neighbors...
- Dancer0
My Creative Director is called Cat
- Do you play cat and mouse with her?neue75_bold
- heheheheheehkelpie
- 23kon0
you can get stuff to sprinkle over your garden that cats dont like and wont go near it.
alternatively, get a hosepipe or a decent water pistol to zap the cat everytime it comes in to do its business. it'll soon learn a lesson.- we used to do that to keep Jehovah's Witnesses away...neue75_bold
- hehehe23kon
- There's something you can sprinkle to keep Jehovah's Witnesses away?locustsloth
- mimeartist0
just get the powder stuff or one of those sonar things, and stop moaning like a baby
- you moaning like a kitteni_R_error
- are you an uphill gardener or something... you're being very protective of your pansies?mimeartist
- Jnr_Madison0
Just batter it's fucking head in with a car jack.
- Peter0
Talked to your neighbors about this? The ones responsible (but not really accauntable...it's an animal for little Jesus sake).
Shit on their frontpoorch?
Argue with your wife at night?Just hope they won't bury you.
- 0000000
Fill up four bottle of water and leave them around the perimeter of your house, should keep cats from coming in.
you can also use the simple technic of buying a ferret, they're friendly and cats are scared shitless of them
or get a shotgun
- weave0
Speaking from experience the super soaker works and is great fun almost worth getting your lawn crapped on.
- creative-0
At least you don't get Jnr_Madison coming round and shitting in your fridge
- 23kon0
how does the four bottles of water thing work?
do cats have a superstition "never go into the square created by water bottles"
??
- moth0
No Kon.
It's a cat. It is not superstitious. Furthermore, it can't bloody read.
- 23kon0
wait till the cat is in mid-squat then go out and scare it off with the supersoaker.
theres one thing worse than getting soaked when you go to have a dump .... and thats getting soaked when you are having a dump and having to run off at fullspeed with half a shit hanging from your ass.
the cat will learn a lesson fast - not to go to your garden when it fancies an enjoyable dump
- neue75_bold0
- Look out i_R_error. Drill cat is coming....Hall
- Is that Machine Girl's cat?locustsloth