jokes thread
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- trooper
I had a wank over an ex girlfriend last night... i know its wrong but i still have a key and shes a heavy sleeper lol.
- kelpie0
why do you always put a baby feet first into a blen---
- blaw0
What's red on white and finds related topics?
- fugged0
how much calcium does a kiss have in it?
- fugged0
what's the difference between a woman taking a bath and a nun?
- 5timuli0
What's black and white and can't turn round in an elevator?
- A nun with a spear through her neck.5timuli
- well weaponkelpie
- I ruined it by saying 'elevator'.
:,(5timuli - na.. it's whats black white and red and can't turn around in a passage way?CheDouglas
- a nun with a javelin through her head.CheDouglas
- six0
dunno
- Dancer0
I was at a cash machine the other day and an old lady was infront of me in the queue.
She turned around and said "my sight is bad can you check my balance..?"
....So I pushed her over
- six0
Woman been in a coma for 4 months. Nurses were giving her a blanket bath and accidentally touched her fanny and there was a response on the monitor... They tried again, and sure enough there was another response. They explained to her husband that a little oral sex might be good for her and might even bring her out of the coma. They drew the curtains for some privacy... Moments later the monitors went crazy and the woman was dead! "What happened"? cried the nurses!!!! The husband said "I think she choked"
- trooper0
Actually happened today... in a supermarket cueing up. theres a granny in front of me and a woman in front of her whos just about to pay. the woman asks the granny to move away for 'security reasons' and gives her a dirty look... and i thought... so thats what bi-focals are for... magnifying the keypad to steal other peoples pin numbers. when i left the store i 1/2 expected a granny and an old man kicking the woman to the floor and robbing her credit card lol