Dead sleepers
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- ismith
Anyone else here die when they go to sleep? Every damn night I sleep so deep, nothing can wake me up. Guitar amp cranked to 10? Nope. Construction one room over? Nope. Family shaking me and spraying water on my face? Nope. I wake up when my body says it's time, it's time, end of story.
Also because I realize that the thread topic made this rather anti-climactic I have included the obligatory awesome/scary combo of superheroes and zombies. AHHHHH!
- kelpie0
wow
BTE
- skt0
I walked fo about 8 miles along cliffs yesterday, then travelled back to london for 3 hours or so, then failed to sleep at all. even though i was fucking knackered.
fuck you sleepers.
- Fucking Knackered!.... say, does she have a sister?robotron3k
- 2 sisters?Raniator
- Pam and her five sisters.5timuli
- ornj0
try turning the amp to 11
- Raniator0
sure your not pretending to be asleep?
- kona0
you sure it's water?
- hahaJaline
- yeah i saw kona slip in your room with a copy of the sears catalog, and his pants unzipped7point34
- unzipped? dude i had the zippers replaced with velcro a long time ago. it's quicker.kona
- you didn't have any pants on, kona, no need to be shy about itJaline
- teach me7point34
- first you must snatch the pebble from my hand asshopper. then... i will know you are worthy.kona
- which hand? the one you've been picking you ass with? or the one holding the sticky sears catalog?7point34
- neither. the one i had cast and molded with rubber last month that i use for 'teh stranger'kona
- rubber.... stranger....
[scribbles furiously]7point34 - hahahahhaahflavorful
- flavorful0
I've mastered the art of fake sleep. I've fake slept sometimes for hours, and even though attempts to wake me up. Not being able to smile, or crack a joke almost kills me, but I know I can't. So I have to act like I'm one of you dead sleepers.
I wouldn't want to be a dead sleeper, I would think something would happen to me if I was. I'm not particularly trusting ... of anything, and have a bit of eccentric behaviour as a result that my friends make fun of me for but have now accepted (like how I set things up in my apartment so I can tell if someone's been in it while I'm not there, purposely driving to and from work in different routes so no one can get a routine down on me, etc.).
I like being aware of my surroundings even when I'm asleep if that makes any sense. I get used to the usual noises that take place in the nite, however, other foreign sounds wake me ... but I'm very conscious about not startling myself awake and just slowly peek out of my eyes to see if immediate action is needed, and if not just slowly get up and go into kill mode.
So yea ... I guess I'm a psycho now that I think about what I've written here. Is this the clear button?
- * Makes note of logging on to QBN time.Spookytim
- I do the same thing... acting spontaneously to nullify patterns in my actions. I used to be wicked paranoidismith
- We know ismith, we know.Spookytim
- Yea, I don't think I'm paranoid but apparently I'm the most paranoid person a lot of people know, hahah.flavorful
- Oddly enough, I was more paranoid before the drugsismith
- I don't do the drugs,
Baby, I move the drugs,
Right on the computer love,
It sound like computer love.flavorful - DIP SET!flavorful
- Spookytim0
Why have you mastered the art of dead sleeping?
I have tried it often for fun, but smile after about two seconds. What has driven you to perfect it?
- ninjasavant0
thats what happens when you go to bed hammered every night.
HAY-OHHHHHHH!
- flavorful0
You know what ... I actually did write something really long and ridiculous and decided to replace my reasoning as to why I've mastered the art of dead sleeping with the following:
What can I say? I'm a classy scumbag.
- Spookyhome0
I was poised, ready to disentangle to delusions that lead you to perfect the art of deadsleeping, slowly unwind all that angsty backroom psycho-twine that binds your mind and deforms your thoughts, but then I thought I'd just say:
Good on you.
- Mr_1000000
Less weed.
- I concur. It aint good.Spookyhome
- Not when you have to wake up.Mr_100000
- or make sense of... anything really.Spookyhome
- flavorful0
Here are some fun ways I like to wake other people up:
01. Jumping up and down on the bed singing "GOOD MORNING, GOOD MORNING! YOU SLEPT THE WHOLE NITE THROUGH! GOOD MORNING, GOOD MORNING, TO YOUUUUUUUU!!!!"
02. Getting within an inch of their face and then start yelling, "GO TO SLEEP! GO TO FUCKING SLEEP!!! AHHHH!!!! GO TO FUCKING SLEEP!!!!" then start jumping around the room knocking everything over while repeating that mantra (PCU-style).
03. Standing within eye shot of them and start simulating like I'm wacking off in my shorts or whatever and then making a noise just loud enough for them to kind of open up an eye ... and the first thing they see is me watching them sleep pleasuring (fake) myself and I'll whisper, "Shhh ... shhh ... go back to sleep. Shhh."
04. Pots + Pans = Noise.
05. Simulating a fake phone conversation about how I wish I would have gotten my AIDS results back yesterday, asking if I'm in the contagious phase yet, and when should I start using condoms.
I really have no idea how people stand me to be honest.
- So this is what you were posting for the past 20 minutes. i was wondering where you were...Jaline
- i will give you 10 dollars for video evidence of you doing any of these7point34
- hahah I'm in and out of meetings all day all pissy because I was supposed to be helping ...flavorful
- ... out the last second type things for the Primary tomorrow.flavorful
- Hahaha no video material as of yet. I was thinking about getting a camera though...flavorful
- ukit0
so what's the problem? consider yourself lucky.
- acescence0
i am a super light sleeper. a number of years back i had a roommate like you. i would come home to him sleeping on the sofa, and he'd "wake up" and i'd conversations with him that he would later not at all remember having. every morning i would wake up to his alarm beeping endlessly, walk to the other end the apartment, and pound on his door until he'd wake up and shut it off