Things to Own
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- 171 Responses
- Meeklo0
What a load of crap..
- emokid0
i wasn't in this thread yet
anzelina
(Jun 20 05, 20:20i know you weren't but the anticipation was making me giddy.
- anzelina0
this thread cracked me up
- anzelina0
hi anzelina!
emokid
(Jun 20 05, 16:43)
________________i wasn't in this thread yet
- anzelina0
1. maybe, but i don't display it.
2. yes
3. no
4. i don't pick up guys.
5. yes i love beer.
6. no
7. yes
8. no
9. yes
10. no
- blaw0
*skips onehundredsixtyfive posts and types...
no.
- scarabin0
furthermore, the earplugs thing are an insult, i don't give a shit what kind of reading material you have in your bathroom (?), but if you do, make it girly.
why would i wanna see man stuff in your bathroom? i want to see unconquered territory.
- SteveJobs0
girls things:
1. photo: sure
2. heels: sure
3. f*ck no! unless you want to date a wife-beater-wearing thug that ends his sentences with 'dog' and 'yo'.
4. pickup line: if you need a pickup line, then you shouldn't use one. if that was confusing, let's hope you've at least mastered the art of body language...
5. if you're gonna stock a six pack, put together a custom pack with an assortment to suit his tastes. (ie. negro modelo, duvel, chimay, etc). many of the new trendy whole foods grocers allow you to put together your own custom six pack.
6. bathroom mags: take the beer approach as noted above. architecture, travel and food are always good choices.
7. business card: if your employer didn't issue you a box of these and your not a successful freelancer, avoid this. you're trying too hard. bar napkins are a cheap and convenient alternative.
8. earplugs: wtf? i don't snore!
9. queer eye gay guy: you can get these guys a dime a dozen these days. that show had 'em pouring out the closet door. why speed dial when you can conference call and have your love life and bathroom decor dilemmas solved instantly?
10. condoms: population control starts at home.
- Jaline0
Married men change their underwear twice as often as single men.
says so here:
http://www.funny2.com/facts.htm
- benfal990
wow that was so funny..
- Jaline0
true
- scarabin0
i agree wholeheartedly with the male article, and disagree with the business card part of the female article.
business cards are great, but they're strictly for business.
hand one out to someone you're trying to seduce and you've lowered the whole thing to a business exchange.
wanna look like a professional whore? hand a man your business card.
at least be fun and write it on his hand or something, or just have him put it in his phone; it's much more personal.
- SteveJobs0
sorry i'm late, here's my much respected response for men:
1.espresso: fine, but top notch not needed for a good cup of trende latte.
2. lamp: yes, a nice lamp with a warm ambient glow is very inviting, as it makes for a more 'comfortable' atmosphere.
3. swiffer sucks. period.
4. couch: girls instinctively march to your bead and pull off your comforter to cuddle with on the couch. this is a universal mating call, so make sure your couch can double as a bed!
5. underwear: optional. this one is always subjective, but girls always like the feeling of a firm ass when pulling off your 501's, so make thier job of stipping you easier...
6. key-ring: do this if one day you aspire to have your own home improvement show.
7. $150+ jeans: see #5. the important thing is the fit. a pair of $400 jeans aren't worth the denim their stitched together with if they aren't complimenting your firm ass.
8. $200+ dress shoes. like wheels on a car, shoes can make or break your style. it's bad enough when we see a wallstreet tycoon stopping to tie his chuck taylors in his armani pinstripe. emo's dead, delete your myspace account.
9. 300-thread sheets. this should be a given. but it's equally important to have a comfortable bed. a sqeaky set of springs can make her forget about how high her quarter bounced off your ass.
10. cooking: master a few panty-peeling recipes, or if you're on a tight schedule (lazy), at least take the time to learn the different types of wine as well as wine etiquette. this will pay off handsomely (assuming your date is old enough to drive, otherwise, kool-aid jello shots are your game).
good luck fella's and remember to lift the seat!
love
SteveJobs
x0x0x0
- Jaline0
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MrDinky
(Jun 20 05, 17:38)OHNOYOUDONT
- designerror0
I use my Graphic Diagrams as toilet paper when i run outta $100 bills
- MrDinky0
------ the end-------
- nick0
this thread has become stupid
Spix
(Jun 20 05, 17:27)no its cause i am in here that why
nick
(Jun 20 05, 17:35)fuck this thread, im goin to the NT Cyber Gang Bang thread!
MrDinky
(Jun 20 05, 17:37)
- MrDinky0
this thread has become stupid
Spix
(Jun 20 05, 17:27)no its cause i am in here that why
nick
(Jun 20 05, 17:35)
- nick0
nice 1 graf
- nick0
this thread has become stupid
Spix
(Jun 20 05, 17:27)