suicide
Out of context: Reply #56
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- mugwart5
God I hope I can convey this into words correctly, always found it impossible to externalizing my feelings into words in open forums. I'll probably regret this in about 10 mins!
All in my IMAO - this topic is huge and goes very deep into all our lives and how we live and how the world's power is structured.
For me it's about the quality of life we have been lead to believe in as a child and what 'calls' up from us internally on whom we are and what we want to do with our lives, for me this is organic. My issue is what we are forced to live in a structure that destroys us and breaks us down. To me at least, someone that has key depression, its not just chemicals in the brain, its how we are forced to live and its hostile life conditions, and our toxic food we fuel our gut with, if our food and psychology were fertilizer it wouldn't grow a fucking dandelion.
We are taxed to our eyeballs, no chance to save up for a future, no small house, no healthy retirement, what we dream for and to be is normally taken from us by 'harsh reality' that has been set up to benefit the upper class. The hours and conditions are insane. Christ I'm 9-6 on a good day, then I have to study at home.
Not meaning to get in to a negative debate about feminism (I'm really not anti) but it sucks to be a man just as much, if not more so than its been lead to believe. 99% the working force has been pigeon holed into cubical and abused by a sociopath boss. Live out non-existent lifes and die early years of retirement. The amount of support you have is next to none. 1 in 4 are abused and not many speak up about this. "man up" is all the advice. Which is why (I believe) is part of the reason the male rate is a lot higher.
Child support is insane and it chokes you. I have to pay not to be abused and to be happy each month ... which takes away my nest egg funds for myself and mainly my son. I can't give my son a garden and a room to decorate - holidays in the sun. Which fucking kills me inside.
We simply have been cattle to the elite, a conveyor belt from birth into 'factory'. When was the last time a power was not from the same fucking families? (I'm British but the rest of the world aint much better).
People get lost and can't find a way out.
No one in the west takes psychology into every day account. Bullying is normal, it's why that poor girl jumped. I know a lady last year that just told me that she attempted last year and after hours talking to her she was victim to narcissistic abuse within work place.
Work will never take it seriously as hell half the bosses are probably sociopaths (over generalized sweeping statement).We, as a people, are so divided and educated to have such polar opposites over beliefs we have no community. While we all argue over pronouns (again something that should be taking into account for fair life quality) drones are still being used to attack remote villages and in UK there are massive protests for anti semantics but no one has spoken about the war crimes at Gaza strip. Just reading about that place and the hypocrisy makes you well up and think about that bridge you walk over every day.
This is really hard to word without it reading a rant and the points are so many and vast it's hard not to read this as vague.
I feel the way out of this problem is easy yet impossible as it invokes people getting active. Avoid banks that do damage, companies that track its customers and employees hand movements, demand end to corruption and money wars. I feel quality of life would improve 10 fold as people have to 'be' and not sleep through existence.
I'm writing from vast experience of depression and attempts, I still scratch my head as to why I'm still alive, this moment in time I'm only still breathing as the damage it would do to my son would be untold, yet its a struggle every day.
I wish people would stop going to the Tescos and Amazons and build communities. I'm learning to brew Kombucha, fermented veg and sew clothes. Anyone up for starting a trade community in London by the end of the year let me know!
Forgive the epic post. Just something very close to my chest.
- don't take me wrong, but I think abandoning for a community alternative lifestyle is not necessarily the right answer (I wish it wasn't)...uan
- ...we should at least try to introduce more sustainable economic principles into the system.uan
- Seems like most of living humanity is descendant from generations of slaves engineered by its masters.
Hope you feel better :)sofas - https://www.youtube.…sofas
- ^ yeah, I'm well versed in this notion.
@uan, I don't mean a hippy comune (I'm goth for starters) - I just mean get more involved, be more not observe.mugwart - Since children sometimes adapt more easily compared to grown ups and realising reality has its pros (and cons), would it be good to convey this to your son?sofas
- feel bad about the length of this - alot to get out!mugwart
- @ sofa - I'm bringing him up with honesty. We talk about everything good and bad. We don't have any other family on my side so we are all we have.mugwart
- so yes there is positives. just rather brutal!!mugwart
- Good post...I would say most of what you describe is built into the system of modern Western life...so you really have to opt out of the system to avoid them.yuekit
- But most people lack the risk taking or imagination to opt out... so they get stuck on the same treadmill as everyone else.yuekit
- ^ why baby steps is all that is needed. Start off grass roots is all that is needed. Just stop buying from cunts make them accountablemugwart
- Y'all should go to Lanyu island, Sure were duped into host taiwanese nuclear waste, but life out there is pretty simple. Go fishing. Eat dried flying fish..shapesalad
- .. Eat yams. Check the weather, go fish at 5am, relax all day. etc. If you get away from LDN, NYC, LA... the west, life is still fairly simples.shapesalad
- *Sure they were duped into hosting...shapesalad
- Hmmm never heard of Lanyu. But there are lots of places like that in the world. I've been splitting my time between Bali and Thailand past few months.yuekit
- Lanyu / Orchid Island, quiet a world away. Wonderful though. Beautiful traditional boats. Dried flying fish tastes amazing. Life is good.shapesalad
- You got us mug. And endless supply of set psb.pango
- ^ someone has to keep us together, it's probably both you and set!mugwart
- @shape -- what vegan options you have over there!!?mugwart
- Should be something... the sweet potato/taro over there is super good. Taiwan has buddhist monk temples that do amazing creature free foods.shapesalad
- Very touching mug... thanks for sharing your feelings. But I think there are still places to live a life with dignity in the west...OBBTKN
- I agree as well. I'm not saying up and leave to some far away place. I'm saying stand our ground, "wake up" a bit and start improving our landscape.mugwart