Client of the Day

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  • hans_glib0

    We are looking for 2 x videos to be animated and made for us, one explainer and one brand video. We will provide the full script and storyboard we are looking for someone to make these explainers and videos for us including putting the voice over on in 3 different languages.

    We are looking to pay 100 per day.

    • < just seen this on yunojunohans_glib
    • it's worth knowing "get fucked" in 3 different languages.MrT
  • Projectile0

    I recently had to create a poster that said "say it how it is" instead of "say it like it is" because english isn't their first language, and Grammarly probably corrected the original

    This gives me similar vibes

    • LOL that's doing the rounds on LinkedIn right now too. Copywriters everywhere howling in a chorus of despair.Horp
    • But as everybody always eventually concludes... It's just fucking Brewdog, so who fucking cares.Horp
    • no one bothered to say the phrase out loud before going to print? lolprophetone
  • MrT5

    "Thanks for all the logo files, but I think you missed a couple. Could you send a JPEG of the white version."

  • _niko8

    So we pitched an engineering firm for a decent sized project and they finally approved it after whatever internal approval process they had in place.

    The pitch was 8 years ago.

    • hahah, but they get to pay the same rate, right?

      Right?
      Nairn
    • Haha fuck no...was thinking the same thing_niko
    • 8 years of inflation... double up!Gnash
    • HS2?BaskerviIle
    • That's engineers for ya. Get ready for them to question every step of the project, and your resultscanoe
    • lolmilfhunter
  • tank021

    Found this on LinkedIn.

    What a hellscape

    The Role
    Responsibilities
    • Utilize Al tools such as Dall-e & Midjourney to generate up to 500 lifestyle images focusing on toothpaste tubes and associated elements per month. The access & subscription for the Al tools will be provided.
    • Implement Photoshop skills to refine and enhance Al-generated images, incorporating brand elements, such as logos, onto generated images as needed. Please note that you should have your own subscription to Photoshop.
    • Uphold image quality standards and align with specifications for website placement.
    • Interact with stakeholders globally, ensuring effective communication and understanding of varied requirements.

  • PhanLo1

    L O L
    -

  • sted3

    Brand new client with a nice project what looks like a long term gig for 3-4 people. Got me awesome super excited really quick, after some nice talks we understand each other, everything is alright.
    I asked for a skype contact, got an invite.
    Nickname includes "trump".
    A world collapsed in me, right now all I can think about is when is it going to go crazy...

    • You were still using skype?! Buahahhahahahahahaha...grafician
    • Don't do it.canoe
    • imagine going through life this brainwashedHayoth
    • "I saw the word 'trump' somewhere and it seriously affected me."robthelad
  • whatthefunk3

    • sounds like a Hayoth requestutopian
    • lol... probably genuine.shapesalad
    • whatthefunk?canoe
    • Conflicted. Tell them they’re a moron or take up the challenge to make it happen. Like every client request_niko
  • grafician3

    What if...

    • blue sky = hope future.... such a genuine 'client' level amend.shapesalad
    • "try with a happier picture" lolmaquito
    • There's an ongoing joke between friends, "I'm the God Damn Designer". Luckily Milton Glaser never had to deal with worrying about standing up for our part.canoe
  • utopian1

    ^^^^^.

    • Experience is everything. Charge what you're worth!canoe
    • hourly rates... it's not plumbing, it's creative work, it takes time to just get into it.shapesalad
    • isn't this the basic kind of shit you learn a few years into the job after school?inteliboy
  • canoe1

    Last night was an unparalleled real-life nightmare. The kind of situation you know 'could' happen working in design, but never had until slack pings, "He really wants to see this idea."

    4.5 different shapes or typefaces in a two word logo with 6 letters. This logo is so bad - even though it was designed by committee - I'd still never show my face here again.

    I previously provided 20 ideas, at least 2 acceptable by my standards. So at this point I'm kinda perturbed right, so I had to mention that maybe it's not the logo and it's the name of the app.

    After all that I feel like I have designer's nausea this morning. It's been a while, but that good ol' feeling of cognitive dissonance has kicked in.

    If every client had a jingle this would fit nicely -

    • Been there... patience ;)OBBTKN
    • Thank god I haven't heard anything from them today... 4 hours of "make it bigger" last night is all I can handlecanoe
  • rodzilla0

    Best comment this week.

    "Make it full bleed, but keep everything away from the edges."

    • noiceCALLES
    • maybe they wanted the BG color to bleed?scarabin
    • but not the contentscarabin
    • dunno.. makes perfect sense to me. unless you take it 100% literally..Projectile
    • it does make sense, the source it came from made me take it very literally. ha, wasn't as good as I thought I guess.rodzilla
    • maybe they wnated your eyes/brain to bleedmaikel
    • http://www.amazon.co…vaxorcist
    • Dumbass.404NotFound
    • I did that 10 years ago for homework, with my eXacto knife.stanislav
    • ^ been there, had to go to the hospital, cut part of the tip off. horrible manager docked me from not coming in with a 1000 lbs headache in my fingercanoe
  • OBBTKN0

    During a meeting last Friday:

    Me: By the way, you haven't sent me the material in high resolution yet...

    Client (a sales manager): (name of the intern) hasn't given it to you yet? Honestly, we don't know where she is, she hasn't shown up at the office all week...

    And I mean, an employee (even though she's an intern) doesn't show up in your office all week, she doesn't show signs of life, and you don't even bother to worry about her? Not only for the proper functioning of the company, for professionalism, etc. If not, for humanity? Maybe he is not well, something has happened to her or who knows...

    Apart from seeming despotic, cynical and unprofessional, he shows not to have the minimum of humanity.

    • He probably mixed a little too much azucar and narcissism in his bullshit-for-the-day elixircanoe
  • RumperChunk0

    I have a US based client, a conglomerate of companies, but big. 60bn a year big. It’s a very specialised in some areas and having worked with their engineers for years now, I have no fucking idea why they make money. Their operations are a joke.

    Anyway... last year about May time they asked if I could design a product... I asked for the deets- they sent me a competitors material and said we need to update our existing product to reflect the competition (lazy, but big corp isn’t exactly innovative) to which I respond with a set of questions etc etc. Don’t hear anything until December - and it’s all panic / need it now / let’s go... so I invoice the first stage, in £ - and they pay within a few days. So now I have the money and I’m all ready to go - but I need some important details and info (easy shit like physical dimensions, and model numbers of parts to be used)... it doesn’t ever arrive. It’s a year later now, and despite my emails I have received nothing.

    This week I get an email from the account dept saying they want the money refunding, as the project is cancelled. When I ask why it’s been cancelled they tell me it’s because no work was delivered... un-fucking real...

    And to top it off the £ has crashed so fucking bad, it might cost me 20% more to pay back if they want the $... all because some lazy ass marketing fuck knuckle can’t get his shit together.

    My other problem is I work across the group and have been recommended many times to other subsidiaries... so this could blow up in an awkward way.

    Middle management mediocrity’s a bitch.

    • Open a spread betting account, trade £/$ next week. Make 20% back.shapesalad
    • Put in your conditions, that is there is not reaction to invoice in 3 months, the request of refund is void. Or 50% kill fee.tank02
    • Email back from a different email address, a woman name - reply, sorry it's been so long, unfortunately Rumper died in a car crash.shapesalad
    • you couldn't find 'easy shit like physical dimensions, and model numbers of parts to be used' on your own?canoe
  • whatthefunk-1
    • Weddings have websites?Gnash
    • She has the right to refuse anyone service just don’t be a bigot about itmonospaced
    • "Create Freely" - Ironyutopian
    • don't give cunts timeimbecile
    • Also in the News: A Colorado gay couple say they refuse to hire straight graphic designer to create their wedding website.shapesalad
    • notcanoe
  • oey_oey1

    Client needs help redesigning website, make it have less text and focus more on illustration work. Okay.

    One year later, after a year not having files to work with, and after 4 changes of opinion on how the portfolio page should look like, and instead of f*cking fill in the text for the work in the portfolio like for a year now, changes the last layout I've made and puts there more text than work.

    She's a friend of mine, I've received good money but after two years asking: please fill in the work's info like the year, technique, client, small text, tags and categories...no, messes with the website for the 5th time...

    The compeltion o the website hangs now for 6 months in the portfolio page so I can move to the home page, but nothing either has categories or has 5 categories that make it impossible to sort when using conditions...

    I think I'm gonna pass, give her 2 months or else I'll have to move forward.

    I also do the maintenance and that would be an awkward position but the last year it has been really frustrating.

    So, lady please pay Elementor, pay GeneratePress, pay the plugins, find a Cloud Service for your backups that you'll have to do yourself, write the support of your hosting company, learn why tags, categories, capture and description are important, go back your 500 vacation drawings that you upload with your phone and we have to spend one hour to find the one, update plugins, do the damn back-end too, mess and fumble as much as you want, etc etc etc...

    Because we have gone full circle! Grrr!...

    • sorry, I was in the need to let this out.oey_oey
    • fuck, she changed the typography, evertything in the same font, text, titles, subtitles, links in classic blue that don't fit the rest of the color scheme...oey_oey
    • titles just in Bold, text not really formatted...
      she invested in a template and I've been working around it since March and she just totally destroyed it.
      oey_oey
    • like the template was actually never needed. WTF?! I think I'll quit asap.oey_oey
    • "The compeltion o " = the completion ofoey_oey
  • shapesalad1

    If only all clients could be like King Charles the III, “Approved.”

    • Somebody needs to make it a gif or a video loop.shapesalad
  • nb4

    “client not paying your invoice? lower the opacity by 1% every day until their design slowly fades away ✨”

    - Daryl Ginn

    Imagine this as a plug-in connected to your invoicing software hahah

  • Nairn1

    At 20:54 I just took a call from someone asking how much my hourly rates were (clearly stated on my site) and upon response asked "how many 2p-sized cuts [in random material] could I get for that?". On the phone. AT nearly 9pm.

    I wasn't rude, but I sure as fuck wasn't exhibiting American-levels of customer service.

    I only answered 'cos I'm working late and someone's popping over to pick something up, so thought it might be them.

    Who the fuck thinks they're going to get useful customer service from a small business at 9pm?

    • Oh, and upon asking for my email (again, clearly stated on site) quickly jabbered it back in NATO phonetics to check, in a strong accent, like.. dude.Nairn
    • Your pricing is not very clear at all mate.
      No wonder client called at 9PM for a quote
      grafician
    • not to mention white text on black background is hard to read...grafician
    • But my price is in mint green on black.Nairn
    • And I only have my headings in white. All other text is in off-white, light grey. And I don't use black, but off-black.Nairn
    • Whatever, that still doesn't excuse someone from phoning at near 9pm.Nairn
    • LOL @ graficianoey_oey
    • Maybe don't use comic-sans for your website font? Just a thought.shapesalad
    • These clowns know your small business website?monospaced
  • lemmy_k6

    I just had a client ask if I could custom make four barstools for half price because I am out of their price range. What an insult.

    • Tell them you can, but the stools will only have two legs each.shapesalad
    • Tell them to stop doing coke and that way they will stop squeezing their suppliersOBBTKN
    • sounds like a real bar stewardFax_Benson
    • Lol shapelemmy_k
    • lol shapeYakuZoku
    • They should be embarrassed... imagine waking into a Porsche dealership and demanding a 911 for half price because it's out your price rangeprophetone
    • Or politely let them know you can build two now for that budget, and when they secure the remaining half of budget you can make two moreprophetone
    • LOL prophetone. I used a Lamboghini analogy for my son.lemmy_k
    • +1prophetone
    • should've said you could do some table stools for that price. they're half the height :Pmicrokorg
    • I remember someone saying that Americans don’t know how to haggle.monospaced