CRUSHED AND MELTED

Out of context: Reply #8

  • Started
  • Last post
  • 20 Responses
  • mg330

    I once had a sign that a family member gave me that read something like:

    THIS FACILITY IS USED FOR FAA AIR TRAFFIC CONTROL AND ANY TRESSPASSING OR UNAUTHORIZED ACCESS COULD RESULT IN DISMEMBERMENT OR DEATH. PERSONS FOUND TRESPASSING AND ACCESSING THIS PROPERTY WILL BE PROSECUTED UNDER THE FULL EXTENT OF THE LAW AND SUBJECT TO FINES OF UP TO $100,000.

    --
    It was a pretty big sign. In a moment of procrastination in college, I printed out new words in the same font and taped them over a portion of the sign to make it read a little, uh, differently...

    THIS FACILITY IS USED FOR FAA AIR TRAFFIC CONTROL AND ANY TRESSPASSING OR UNAUTHORIZED ACCESS COULD RESULT IN DISMEMBERMENT OR DEATH. PERSONS FOUND TRESPASSING AND ACCESSING THIS PROPERTY WILL BE SEMI-SUBMERGED IN CHOCOLATE AND FORCE FED LIVE LIVE SEA EELS.
    --

    And I attached that f*cker to a brick wall beside my 2nd floor apartment's balcony, it was right where EVERYONE would see it going into the center door section or the stairs to the second floor.

    --
    Then one day, I was sitting on the couch reading, it was nice out and we had the patio door open. I hear this (imagine a deeper voiced version of Lil John and Dave Chapelle) voice go "WHAT! Chocolate and EELS!!!! THAT'S CRAYZEE!"

    Made my year!

View thread